Sunday, April 01, 2007

It seemed a good idea at the time.



If you look down to the floor (not to close, I didn't vacuum) you'll see a wooden wedge which has slipped out from under the bookcases. This is an oldish building and the wedge was intended to make up for an uneven floor that tilts the bookcases forward in a precarious sort of way.

I washed the curtains this weekend, and because you can't actually get into the corner on the left without dismantling the room, I've worked out a system whereby I thread them onto the curtain rod, stand on a chair by the balcony door and then fling the curtained rod in the direction of the hook on the far left. Mostly this works. All I have to do then is move the rickety kitchen chair to the left corner, lean over about three feet while stretching to the ceiling & make sure the rod in actually in it's hook.

But I noticed after (carefully) limping off the chair that the left side curtains looked wrong. Oh joy, the middle panel had tabs hanging limply off the rod. I'd sort of forgotten about the tilt, so I cleared the plants and flowers, the bowls of stones and (carefully) climbed up to stand on the top of the bookcase. It was at this point that I had a religious experience. The bookcase began to sway a little and I began to pray, fervently as I threaded curtain tabs and wobbled on my bad ankle. "Oh Lord, just don't let the bookcase break or fall over and I will never ever do this again, Amen."

Evidently there is a God.

I went back to beading, because the worst that can happen with that is a foul temper and finger pricks.

Later, the Scorpio phoned. He called because a lady was hit by a car at a crosswalk near my house and, he said, he wanted to make sure it wasn't me. I was so touched by his concern that I made extravagant promises of a sexual nature, only to realize later that while he is worried about my well-being, he also has been calling me Gerald Ford (Google it, those under 40) lately and is mightily entertained by my propensity towards falling off my own shoes.

I didn't say anything about the curtains, just in case.

15 comments:

edvard moonke said...

oh you do seem to enjoy giving 'bad luck' a chance, don't you?

LJ said...

Well, EM. I live alone. If I lived with someone else, I'd probably try to give them the opportunity to risk their neck.

Darkmind said...

Gerald who? BWA HA HA HA! Does he call you that because of the stumbling or because you obtained two of the highest positions in his life without actually being elected?

jessie said...

Remember, there are thrill seekers who spend a fortune on sports equipment to seek this same adrenalin rush. As for the Scorpio, he probably just thinks they're gonna name a library after you...

Mr Farty said...

Count yourself lucky this time. Mrs Farty once decided to use the bedside cabinet as a stepper (probably also for putting up curtains). Only it was a cheapo one, *really* not designed for standing on. One gashed leg later, she's a bit wiser now, and only stands on expensive cabinets.

LJ said...

D..1. The stumbling, of course. and 2. Isn't that the current president, only once, not twice?
Jess...That's the sort of thing the Scorpio lives for...cozying up with a woman they'll name a library after.
Mr. Farty...Will you and Mrs. Farty please buy me expensive cabinets?

zhoen said...

You have plants over your books? What happens when you slightly overwater?

LJ said...

Why Zhoen, I'm graceful with my plants. It's just my limbs I can't manage! And, well, the books do sit a
little way from the edge of the cases.

Koru's Daughter said...

If I were to select the president for comparison or even to invite to my house, I would pick Gerald Ford. He had a sense of humor, was not obviously corrupt, was athletic, held the rank of Eagle Scout and was widely considered a gentleman.

He wasn't elected but he also wasn't nationally destructive. I kinda miss him.

Besides... how do you run a country when it wore polyester? (He was president in the late '70s).

Eugene Jackson said...

Well said, LJ. And a very nice piece. Thank you

herhimnbryn said...

And God stopped what she was doing and glanced down, seeing the situation getting out of hand she gracefully saw to it that all would be well!

Confession here....I enlarged the image to read see what books were on your shelves( don't you love other peoples book cases?).No luck though. Sulk.

Minor Deity said...

Hey, LJ, we've moved and we're arranging and unpacking things now. Want the opportunity to attempt to maim yourself again? ;)

Mr. X said...

What was that we said the other day about not damaging yourself any further, eh?

Some people... *Sigh*

Please DON'T try harder next time. We do want you to stay all in one piece, you know :)

phlegmfatale said...

well done, you! More curtain mischief managed. I know it must have been about a year ago last time, but I saw the photo of the bookcase first and thought "she moved the bookcases again!" I admire your industry.

LJ said...

I admire my industry too, Phlegmy! Of course, I often admire it in need of traction.